~Phil Mickelson contacted Tiger's wife to pick up tips on how to beat Tiger.
~What's the difference between a car and a golf ball? Tiger can drive a ball 400 yards.
~Tiger Woods wasn't seriously injured in the crash, but he's still below par.
~What were Tiger Woods and his wife doing out at 2:30 in the morning? They went clubbing.
~Tiger Woods crashed into a fire hydrant and a tree. He couldn't decide between a wood or an iron.
~Ping just offered Elin an endorsement contract for her own set of drivers; to be named Elin Woods..."clubs you can beat Tiger with."
~Tiger just changed his nickname but still kept it in the cat family. His new name? Cheetah
~Tiger was driving an Escalade...can he blame the accident on his caddy?
~Hello Mister Woods, this is the On Star operator...we have detected that an angry person has put a golf club through your window, we are contacting Nike for a new club.
~Who among us doesn't hear a car crash and immediately grab the closest golf club we can find??!!
~Tiger's new movie: Crouching Tiger, Hidden Hydrant.
~Tiger Woods owns lots of expensive cars. Now he has a hole in one.